New Sheriff Boss Logsdon – Where the Tabloids Fear to Tread

FAYETTE COUNTY, GA – There’s a new lawman in town. That’s right, Harold “Big Guns” Logsdon is the new top cop and he’s packing some heat. The City Council in Peachtree City decided to keep Big Guns as the overseer of the local police department.

“Somebody has gotta make’em tow the line and help preserve justice,” Logsdon said. Upon receiving the official decree from the council, Logsdon was given a 1922 Colt revolver and three bullets. “I get to put the blue lights up on top of my SUV. I’m proud to serve.”

Big Guns Logsdon is taking the new assignment very seriously. He recently started rounding up vigilante homeowners next to Lake Kedron. “I went to Ace Hardware and got me some rubber hose, so I think we’re ready for the interrogation phase now,” said an excited Logsdon.

The new top cop is also patrolling the cart paths. “We don’t need those red-headed, black, teenage, homosexual, Mexican-look'n types on our cart paths,” barked Logsdon. He inscribed the word “POLEASE” on both sides of his golf cart for emphasis. He is ready for anything and has the tools in his golf cart to prove it, including: 25 flex cuffs, sniper rifle, binoculars, along with a black outfit including a hood and military-style pants with a large “ninja” style sword.

Some citizens were stunned when they saw Logsdon pistol whipping an elderly couple because they had complained about his broken promises on taxes. “He kept screaming ‘You want a roll back! I’ll roll you back!’ while he was whipping them,” said a source wishing to remain anonymous. Logsdon brought the couple before Judge Maxwell yesterday and asked that they by lynched.

Big Guns Logsdon will be the first to tell you that he can’t do it alone. He relies heavily on his Group VI posse to help him keep the peace. “We thought some vandal scumbags might be hang’n out on some land near Starr’s Mill High School so my posse cut all the trees down so we can keep a better eye on the place,” grunted Logsdon. “They also help me beat-up the hobos that hang around the new rail yard on Highway 74.”

With his newfound success in law enforcement, some of the locals believe that Big Guns Logsdon might run for Sheriff next November. Greg Dunn has hinted he might want to be Logsdon’s campaign manager. For now, Logsdon remains silent on his future plans.

Is that comedy or are you actually serious - spear guy

Submitted by Robert W. Morgan on Thu, 08/10/2006 - 6:32pm.

I hope you were doing parody on someone like highgreen or mudcat, but if you are actually serious, you need rehab asap.

login to post comments

Not even good comedy..

Submitted by McDonoughDawg on Thu, 08/10/2006 - 9:31am.

I've seen better from 3rd graders.

login to post comments

Top News, Humor, Wireless

Submitted by Spear Road Guy on Thu, 08/10/2006 - 11:19am.

Oh come on McDonoughDawg, I'm just trying to combine all the day's top news stories.

Wireless technology is great. Everyone at work takes their laptops somewhere else in the office to use them. I was in the restroom last week and heard the clicking of a keyboard from one of the stalls. We have a don't ask, don't tell policy at work.

Vote Republican

login to post comments

Cracked or Drunk?

Submitted by skyspy on Thu, 08/10/2006 - 8:56am.

Careful or Logsdon will have the pooooleeess bust up your meth lab. Drinking before 10am? I guess it has to be 5pm somewhere.

Actually I think I get your point, I don't think the mayor will do anything to harm the police dept. If he does it will be a clear case of retaliation.

login to post comments

“We don’t need those red-headed, black, teenage, homosexual,

Submitted by Spear Road Guy on Thu, 08/10/2006 - 8:52am.

Vote Republican

login to post comments