The Golden Rule (Revised)

I’m a football guy. I played 18 years and have been in the coaching profession for another twenty. When I walk into a football locker room and the stench is enough to hospitalize most mere mortals, I smell the sweet scent of victory. I’m a football guy.

Football guys live by a code. The code includes choosing a buffet over a good book. The code demands fishing and hunting over skateboarding and hacky sack. Living by the code includes choosing Vin Diesel over Vince Gill. The code requires that you must always biggie size. If you live by the code you are expected to treat your offensive linemen better than your girlfriend. Offensive linemen, well, they don’t have girlfriends…

The Code. It has its own Golden Rule. Every football player knows the Golden Rule. It is more about heritage than tradition. It is acknowledged by all members of this sacred fraternity the moment they drink from the golden chalice; better known as the pre-season water bottle.

The Gridiron Golden Rule, “Once a football guy, always a football guy.”

The Code. It has its own Commandments, too.

• Thou shalt not look upon a soccer match without turning into a pillar of salt.

• Thou shalt not participate in P.E. during the soccer unit.

• Thou shalt not buddy around with the team kicker; he plays soccer.

• Thou shalt not (in future years) dress your children like soccer officials. They look like European elves.

• If captured by communists, and forced to play mid-something or another (while running endlessly in booty shorts)…remember…red cards are your only way out.

Today, I admit I am a broken man for having broken the code. I may have forfeited my heritage and my membership as a football guy. For you see, I love soccer.

It happened last spring. I was preparing for my weekly high school sports radio show. I realized that I had not featured any local soccer teams. Big deal. I’m a football guy. We have a code.

However, the e-mails poured in, the coaches complained and parents glared at me in the grocery store. So, I caved in. I forced myself to attend the Starr’s Mill vs. McIntosh varsity girls soccer match at Panther Stadium; 90 minutes later I was emancipated from the “Law” (sent down from Rocky Top engraved by fire into pigskin parchment to the Prophet Knute Rockne). Anyway…

Peachtree City is a soccer hotbed. It begins with the club programs, Lazers and Lightning. It ends with as many college scholarship offers to graduating seniors as Stacy Keibler gets votes on Dancing with the Stars. Last year the Lady Chiefs had nine players receive college scholarships…incredible! The Lady Panthers were no slouch. They had seniors like Lucy Martin sign with LSU. Did I mention McIntosh won the 4A State Championship in a blow out? Did I mention it was for their fourth title?

The single best high school game (all sports) I saw in 2004-05 was the Lady Panthers hosting the Lady Chiefs. It ended in a 3-3 draw. I could not believe the athleticism, speed and physical play being demonstrated on the field. It was graceful. It was bloody. It was a war!

Watching Katie Schultz (McIntosh) and Kelley O’Hara (Starr’s Mill) control a soccer ball is like something from Cirque du Soleil . In case you didn’t know, Kelley is back and arguably the best player in the country. Expect to see her in the next Olympics. But here’s a thought…go see her now!

Both teams have re-loaded and both teams are ranked and ready to make another run at their respective titles. Here’s the best part, they don’t like each other right now. Oh sure, they have played together and been friends since they were four years-old. They will continue to be best of friends…once the “Brawl for the Ball” has ended.

I tried to get both teams to join me for the radio show leading up to their game last season. The coaches agreed to do it; the players refused. Katie Jacobsen told me, “It would not be healthy.” What football guy in his right mind would miss this game? What fan of high school anything would miss this game?

Under normal circumstances I’d have my “football guy” status revoked. I would be a code-breaker. I’d have violated the Gridiron Golden Rule. ESPN would block me from College Game Day. But, I live in Fayette County. We are the home of national powers; the Lady Panthers and the Lady Chiefs! They are incredible athletes. They are among the best in the nation. They train year-round. They sacrifice much. They know pain. They play with passion. They play for perfection. They play with one purpose. They play to be champions.

Yeah, I’m a football guy…that’s why I’m in awe of the Lady Panthers and Lady Chiefs.

P.S, - Look out ladies here come the Lady Wildcats!