Git Real's picture

Democrats, realizing the supposed success of the President's "Cash For Clunkers" rebate program, have revamped a major portion of their National Health Care Plan.

President Obama, Speaker Pelosi, and Senator Hairy Reid are expected to make this major announcement at a joint news conference later this week. I have obtained an advance copy of the proposal which is named.... "CASH FOR CODGERS" and it works like this:

Couples wishing to access health care funds in order to pay for the delivery of a newborn child will be required to turn in one old person. The amount the government grants the will be fixed according to a sliding scale. Older and more prescription dependent codgers will garner the highest amounts. Special "Bonuses" will be paid for those submitting codgers in targeted groups, such as smokers, alcohol drinkers, persons 10 pounds over their government prescribed weight, and any member of the Republican Party.

Smaller bonuses will be given for codgers who consume beef, soda, fried foods, potato chips, lattes, whole milk, dairy products, bacon, Brussels
sprouts, or Girl Scout Cookies.

All codgers will be rendered totally useless via toxic injection. This will insure that they are not secretly resold or their body parts harvested to keep other codgers in repair.

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Submitted by Bonkers on Fri, 08/28/2009 - 7:22pm.

It is a preliminary release to ease the way for what will be the next CASH FOR>>>>>!
I have seen a draft of that bill:


$500 for single homes under 1500 SF
1000 for 1600-2500 SF
2500 for a 10 house neighborhood
3500 for 11-50 house neighborhood
5000 for 50-up neighborhood.

There will be no investigations of these type burnings.

$1000 for autos or trucks over 10 years old
1500 for autos older
3500 for foreign autos

We will reimburse Japan and Korea.

$100,000 fine for employers who have any undocumented or illegal workers.

The employer will also have to return the people to their country. This money to go into unemployment insurance.

Over 60,000-$100,000 15%
Over 40,000-$60,000 10%
Under $40,000 5%
Under $15,000

Solves health costs and economy!

ptctaxpayer's picture
Submitted by ptctaxpayer on Fri, 08/28/2009 - 7:50pm.

Funniest Post of the Year !!!! I saw Bonkie's post and immediately starting laughing my ass off. Very funny Git. The "End of Life Options" shtick is a stand up comic's dream. "Cash for Codgers" ---wow--- I am gonna be stuck on that all weekend. Hey, you might see some foreclosure weenie roasts. P.S. It is legal to burn in PTC if the fuel is used for cooking. 5,000 square foot house to cook 2 dogs?

TinCan's picture
Submitted by TinCan on Fri, 08/28/2009 - 12:19pm.

Can you clarify those categories a little better. Just when I thought I was in the high return category I looked at your lower value list and now I'm not sure what some youngster could earn.

By the way this somewhat relates to the soul food discussion. Sorry to inform y'all but many of those "southern" items were consumed by us damned yankees as well. Never made it to chitlins though and brain consumption was limited to my grandfather.

Submitted by AtHomeGym on Fri, 08/28/2009 - 3:05pm.

Yep, I understand--I was trying to get the fact that WE ALL ATE THE SAME FOOD across to dm but failled. She has always got her sensitivity antenna raised to the max. BTW "Soul Food" term wasn't widely used til the 60's so her assertion that it had something to do with plantation food from the owner's table isn't likely. I didn't like brains & eggs either, but we also had fish roe & eggs. And I probably ate more cream of wheat than grits. but we too had hot biscuits every morning as long as my Father was living. And my wife (my own personal "David's Mother") learned how to make them at my Mother's elbow. For a former Brit, she makes pretty good biscuits and cornbread (the fried kind, not baked).

Submitted by Davids mom on Mon, 08/31/2009 - 3:54pm.

Sorry I missed your point. Sad

Submitted by Davids mom on Mon, 08/31/2009 - 3:17pm.

Couldn't find the other discussion regarding 'Soul Food' - but in the current Atlanta magazine (September) -there is an excellent article on 'Southern Cooking'. The outstanding chefs came in all colors! After some research - the term Soul Food became known to 'others' in the '60s - but those blacks who left the south for California and other locations outside of the south brought with them 'the desire for comfort food - that was affordable. Hence, Soul Food. Eating at Paula Dean's in Savannah brought back memories of Sunday dinner at home. To argue or debate this is clouding the issue that blacks and whites throughout history have enjoyed the same food in the south. Those blacks who left the south called it 'Soul Food'.

On P. 113 in the magazine there is a recipe for Southern Biscuits. Ummmm - good! Smiling

Submitted by Bonkers on Mon, 08/31/2009 - 5:30pm.

This argument about black and white southern food is silly.

If you think that the blacks at TARA with Scarlett O'Hara ate as well as Scarlet did, then you are dreaming.

The prime ham and beef were fairly scarce in the shacks.
Fine French cooking wasn't about to happen there either.

Since they were Irish, they probably ate quite a bit of their own soul food when they desired it: Cabbage, corned beef and potatoes boiled.

I expect the wine in the shacks was inferior. Maybe they got some of the non-bug infested flour and maybe they didn't!

If you are talking about now and not then, then I can vouch that in towns of a majority of blacks, the chain grocery stores even carry food that one won't find any, or very much of, in PTC.
I'm not going to get into just what here but you can go look for yourself!
Why Rich's in W. Atlanta even had special clothes and plenty of them.

I don't think it matters much now. I eat what I was raised upon and they can do the same..."they" being either one.

dawn69's picture
Submitted by dawn69 on Mon, 08/31/2009 - 7:30pm.

Lordy, miss Sca'lett, I dont knows nuthin 'bout makin' no biscuits!

I agree, arguing over food is rather silly considering the other problems and divisions that separate us.

I've changed my diet a lot since my last horrible lipid test. But I still, on occasion, enjoy putting together an ole fashioned meal: bacon fat in the home made cream corn, bacon fat & onion in the fresh green beans, a big glob of bacon fat in the iron skillet for the corn bread, and a glazed ham that would make you slap yourself! Thank god for pigs! I just can't make biscuits worth a damn.

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