A bargain (unattributed AJC)

REQUEST FOR URGENT BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP

DEAR AMERICAN
I NEED TO ASK YOU TO SUPPORT AN URGENT SECRET BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP WITH A TRANSFER OF FUNDS OF GREAT MAGNITUDE. I AM MINISTRY OF THE TREASURY OF THE REPUBLIC OF AMERICA. MY COUNTRY HAS HAD CRISIS THAT HAS CAUSED THE NEED FOR LARGE TRANSFERS OF FUNDS OF 800 BILLION DOLLARS, U.S. IF YOU WOULD ASSIST ME IN THIS TRANSFER IT WOULD BE MOST PROFITABLE TO YOU. I AM WORKING WITH MR. PHIL GRAM, LOBBYIST FOR UBS WHO WILL BE MY REPLACEMENT FOR MINISTRY OF THE TREASURY IN JANUARY. AS A SENATOR YOU MAY KNOW HIM AS A LEADER OF THE AMERICAN BANKING DEREGULATION MOVEMENT IN THE 1990S. THIS TRANSACTION IS 100% SAFE. THIS IS A MATTER OF GREAT URGENCY, WE NEED A BLANK CHECK. WE NED THE FUNDS A QUICKLY AS POSSIBLE. WE CAN'T DIRECTLY TRANSFER THESE FUNDS IN THE NAME OF OUR CLOSE FRIENDS BECAUSE WE ARE CONSTANTLY UNDER SURVEILLANCE.
MY FAMILY LAWYER ADVISED ME THAT I SHOULD LOOK FOR A RELIABLE AND TRUSTWORTHY PERSON WHO WILL ACT AS A NEXT OF KIN SO THE FUNDS CAN BE TRANSFERRED.
PLEASE REPLY WITH ALL OF YOUR BANK ACCOUNT , IRA. AND COLLEGE FUND ACCOUNT NUMBERS AND THOSE OF YOUR CHILDREN AND GRANDCHILDREN TO
WA;;STREETBAILOUT@TREASURY.GOV SO THAT WE MAY TRANSFER YOUR COMMISSION FOR THIS TRANSACTION. AFTER I RECEIVE THAT INFORMATION I WILL RESPOND WITH DETAILED INFORMATION ABOUT SAFEGUARDS THAT WILL BE USED TO PROTECT THE FUNDS.

YOURS FAITHFULLY, MINISTER OF TREASURY, LOAN ARRANGER PAULSON, AND FAITHFUL FRIEND GEORGE