What? Why didn’t they tell me?

It’s not fair, I tell you, it’s just not fair. No matter what we do, we can’t change it. Oh, I’ve tried. Believe me, I’ve tried. But no amount of ranting or raving has worked. When I found out, I stomped around the house for days — didn’t change a darn thing, just scared the cats. Despite all my efforts to stop it, they went ahead and did it anyway. Why didn’t they just leave things alone? Right when we were getting use to the old ones, they go and change, messing everything up.

Personal note: It is with possibly great personal peril that I’m writing this article, but someone’s got to do it. Someone’s got to let the people know what’s going on. And just what’s got my dander up this time? Well, if you haven’t heard, read, or otherwise been told, I guess I have to be the one to break the bad news to you. Get ready; sit down; this will be a shocker. The ‘They’ I am referring to is the government, and the outrage is that a first class stamp has now gone up from 37 cents to 39 cents. Oh, the horror!

To be fair, no one told me they were going to raise the postage rate up to 39 cents. Just like no one told me that the speed limit on Rock-A-Way Road goes from 30 to 45 to 35 and back down to 25 mph. I had to find that one out for myself also, and it cost me just a little bit more than 39 cents. But at least they have big signs posted with the speed limits on them. In contrast, to date, I haven’t seen one big sign about the postage rate going up.

I didn’t see any news on television about the change in rate. Nor did I hear any commercials on the radio, read about it in the newspaper, or receive any advertisement in the mail. Oh, my mistake. That would mean I got my mail when I was supposed to and delivered to the correct address - two things which, for some reason, seem to be difficult to get accomplished.

The postal service – an oxymoron, I know — is the only organization that can charge more for less. Service, that is. The Wife and I have moved three times in the last eleven months, and some of our mail still hasn’t caught up with us. Just how much I really don’t know. I’ll let you know when it all catches up with us.

Yes, we filled out the little change-of-address forms and sent them out, and yes, we told everyone about our new address change, but still our mail gets lost. Don’t really know how much gets lost because it’s lost. Maybe the people mailing letters to us didn’t put enough postage on them? But The Wife and I aren’t the only ones who have been caught by surprise by the increase in postage.

Last week I took a quick trip to Florida to retrieve The Boy from a visit with his granddad; turns out he didn’t know either – Dad, not The Boy. The Boy has no use for stamps. He has no bills. He’s in college now, but when he gets out, he’ll soon have a job, a wife, a couple of kids, and something else. Plenty of bills to mail. He better start saving now because by the way things are going, stamps will be five dollars each.

But unlike other times when I’ve gotten my shorts in a bunch and ranted and raved, this time I actually have a solution to the problem at hand. A solution that will be good for everybody involved: postal worker and us alike. UPS should buy the postal service! Yep. UPS should paint all those postal trucks dark brown; give raises and stock options to all postal employees, along with dividends and bonuses for speedy delivery.

If that happened, then the mail would all be delivered overnight and you’d have some mighty happy former postal employees. Bet that’ll get our mail delivered on time, to the right address, and at a cheaper rate. Until then, guess I’ll just have to be patient. Sooner or later somehow all that lost mail will find its way to our new address. Hope they hurry and get it here; only 15 more years till retirement. Then we’re moving to Ashville, N.C. They’ll never find our mailbox way up there.