Southern hospitality missing for soldier’s kin

Wed, 12/26/2007 - 1:05pm
By: Letters to the ...

My father is in the Army and has been deployed to Iraq since the summer of 2006. He will not be back until May of 2008. I attend college at Pennsylvania State University, so it’s just my full-time-working mother and my younger brother on their own, since all of our relatives live in Massachusetts.

My mom has mentioned to me that sometimes people write in to the newspaper making negative references about “Yankees,” but I ask you, Peachtree City, where is your “Southern hospitality”? Where is your neighborly love? Where is your support for our soldiers?

All of our neighbors and church members are aware that my father is deployed. No one has ever come by the house to see how my mom is doing and ask if she needs help with something.

No one has offered to come over and do our lawn for us so we don’t have to pay for a lawn service.

No one has asked for my dad’s address in Iraq so that they could send him a box or a card.

When my dad visited for two weeks this past summer, we put a huge sign out on our fence welcoming him home. No one stopped by to say “hi” to him and wish him well before he had to go back.

So, Peachtree City, before you send in more letters about your “horrible” experiences with us “Yankees,” look at yourselves and the people around you and see if you’re really being a good person and citizen. Are you setting a good example?

Michelle R. McEvoy

Pennsylvania State University

State College, Penn.

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BPR's picture
Submitted by BPR on Sun, 12/30/2007 - 9:57pm.

I am sorry this has happened to you, it's sad. I can't imagine how hard this is on your Mom, brother and yourself. If you give me the address to your Mom and your Dad I will send a card, better yet I would visit your Mom. My heart goes out to you - take comfort that some of us care and honor what your Dad is doing for us. I could never say thank you enough to our service people. I do pray for them, and I will pray for your Dad by his name everyday for safety, comfort, peace of mind, that God is with him. If you don't mind give the address to both and even yourself and I will keep in touch. Again, I am sorry this has happened to you and your family-

To anyone else reading this that is in the military or has been- I am beyond words- Thank you so much, and God bless you!

"Hope Changes Everything"

BPR's picture
Submitted by BPR on Mon, 12/31/2007 - 12:58am.

Hope this helps you feel better, this is the way I try to live my life, I mess up alot and let people down - Thank God He forgives - Michelle - Lean On Me.

Click Here

Tug13's picture
Submitted by Tug13 on Sun, 12/30/2007 - 9:01pm.

First of all..please tell your dad thank you. I'll say a prayer for him. Give us his address and I will send him a card. I'm sure others will too.

I hope someone has stepped up to help your family in PTC. Smiling

Submitted by Davids mom on Sun, 12/30/2007 - 6:38pm.

I hope that someone has taken the human footsteps to assist your mother. Please let us know. I can't believe that there is no one in Peachtree City or Fayette County who is willing to help a family whose father is serving in the military. As for no one stopping by to say hi - many probably felt that the family wanted to have private time during his visit. Looking forward to hearing from you.

Submitted by bowser on Sun, 12/30/2007 - 5:48pm.

Can’t answer for your church or your neighbors, although be careful what you wish for when it comes to people getting involved in your affairs.

That aside, let me get this straight: You are so concerned about your Mom and bro being "on their own" and barely able to afford yard service that you write a sophomoric letter to the local paper impugning the local citizenry for not paying proper respect. Yet you have decided to decamp for Penn State (presumably at significant family expense) during your family’s hour of need. Wouldn't it ease your Mom's burden if you were at UGA or someplace closer, or are there too many of those darn southerners there for you?

Btw, I appreciate that your Dad's chosen career has put him in a potentially dangerous situation, and I hope he returns safely. But if I was in his shoes right now the very LAST thing I would want my daughter doing back home is demanding recognition and free yard work. So you have to ask yourself, what kind of example are YOU setting?

Main Stream's picture
Submitted by Main Stream on Sun, 12/30/2007 - 6:32pm.

quit ripping on the daughter!

I hope my own daughter is that brave someday, to stand up for what she believes in and voice her opinion, even in a cyber letter to the editor.

Dog - your're being a real turd.

Submitted by bowser on Mon, 12/31/2007 - 12:25pm.

...for offending your sense of smell. Smiling

Anyway, just calling it the way I see it. You may consider her brave, but as far as I'm concerned calling out your Mom's neighbors in the newspaper over some perceived slight is just classless.

I'd even go so far as to say that if the letter reflects the attitude that Ms. McEvoy or her Mom carry with them through life, it's no wonder people don't find them as worthy of special kindnesses as they'd like.

Submitted by d.smith700 on Mon, 12/31/2007 - 3:06pm.

I know nothing about this feud with the soldier, but I am interested in the "calling out" of the neighbors!

Were they called out into the street? Was it to have a fight?

What is going on?

Submitted by pinkst on Fri, 12/28/2007 - 8:20am.

I just like to say to the McEoy family hang on in them ,I know time can be hard because my husband is a disable vet and I have to do everything in my power to keep my family going.My prayer go out to you and your family.And I to say to all of peactree city what a shame because without our soldiers you wouldn't been in you nice big house and driving your nice car, because without them fighting for our freedom we would have to fight for it.So think when you cut your grass,wash your dishies,take your kids out for activity or just to lay down to rest, you think about the soldiers and there faimly and the Hell their are going through day in and day out.

Main Stream's picture
Submitted by Main Stream on Fri, 12/28/2007 - 11:48am.

that not EVERY war is justified or worth fighting. Granted, their were wars in our past history that were justified, however, the invasion of Iraq was not one of them. It sickens me to think of the families, like the McEvoy's, who have loved ones serving in Iraq, or families who have lost a child or spouse in this unjust war - and Prez Bush makes jokes saying "where are those WMD's, they've gotta be somewhere." It sickens me that he lied to us and offered up the lives of our soldiers, and the innocent Iraqi's, as a sacrifice, in order to shove his agenda down our throats. And it sickens me that there are so many Americans who still believe his lies and support him and his party. Stop following him so blindly and use your mind to think and reason. Bush will go down as the worst President in history, for the damage he has caused to our country and the turmoil he unleashed in Iraq.

Submitted by pinkst on Fri, 12/28/2007 - 4:25pm.

To MAIN STREAM You need to stop talk I don't care if bush lie about the war or not. We as Americans need to care for our soldiers and their familys. I don't see running over to Irag or trying to help the soldiers and their family. All that talking you are doing be a big person and call BUSH and tell him how you feel about war or call some of the soldiers family and tell them you are going to cut their grass,pray with them and etc.AS A SOLDIERS WIFE YOU CAN YOUSELF

River's picture
Submitted by River on Fri, 12/28/2007 - 5:25pm.

Hey, I AM a veteran, and I'm trying to tell you that the right to dissent is part of what I was protecting. Now, who are you to tell me or anybody else that we need to stop talking about this war? You say that you don't care if Bush lied about the war or not? Well that speaks volumes, doesn't it? Personally, I care very much. If a president lied about the justification for going to war, that would constitute "high crimes and misdemeanors", and would justify impeachment. Personally, I think he deceived himself as much as anybody, and probably didn't deliberately lie outright, but that's just speculation. However, that's my right.

Freedom of speech in the United States is protected by the First Amendment to the United States Constitution and by many state constitutions and state and federal laws. Criticism of the government and advocation of unpopular ideas that people may find distasteful or against public policy are guaranteed rights of our citizens.

What I fought for, and our soldiers continue to fight for, is the United States Constitution, and our way of life. That includes the right to dissent in public. You are NOT taking that away from me!

Submitted by pinkst on Fri, 12/28/2007 - 6:27pm.

Just to sum everything up just stop talking about the war and pray for all while soldiers because the war is not going to make husband who is a 20 year veteran walk again.AND LIKE THE ARMY SAY"UNITE WE STAND AND UNITE WE FALL" and with that say YOU CAN'T TAKE THAT AWAY FROM ME. GO ARMY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tug13's picture
Submitted by Tug13 on Sun, 12/30/2007 - 9:30pm.

I agree with everything Git said.
Words are not enough, but please tell your husband thank you.

God Bless Smiling

Git Real's picture
Submitted by Git Real on Sun, 12/30/2007 - 9:22pm.

God bless you and your husband. Thank you for your sacrifices. They don't go unnoticed, I can assure you.

Perhaps Cal & Company could start featuring soldiers and their families that are serving, came home wounded and injured, and perhaps even given the ultimate sacrifice. Perhaps through the Citizen some of us could send letters, cards and gifts to these families. Often times it is not because don't's because we don't know.

With that said, please don't direct me to some fundraising site that spends countless bucks soliciting funds.

Thanks to all who have served. There are many on here. Army Major, Hutch, KK Hack, Mixer, Sniffles (I think) and many more that will come to mind after I post this.

I never tell lies about people on my blog.
Especially if I think the truth will do more damage. Cool

Submitted by pinkst on Mon, 12/31/2007 - 7:05am.

I just like to thank everybody who is prying for my husband and thinking of him.And I know everybody have their opinion of the war and the only thing I ask is all the soldiers come HOME SAFE.

River's picture
Submitted by River on Fri, 12/28/2007 - 9:46pm.

I don't agree with you on everything, but like you said, "United, we stand." I certainly agree with that, so I'll just leave it at that.

Have a good night, and know that we all support our troops 100% and greatly appreciate their enormous sacrifice, as well as the sacrifices made by their families. This is regardless of any doubts we might have about the current administration or the current situation. Our troops have never let us down, ever. Let's just focus on that, and say "Thanks!"

Main Stream's picture
Submitted by Main Stream on Fri, 12/28/2007 - 8:15pm.

until our troops come home. I will not stand and unite with 'sheeple' who praise Bush and his Administration. I will not stop dissenting and asking uncomfortable questions or making statements, that irritate people. Your husband fought for our right, to be able to do this.

I read muddle's post:

...we must not be critical. This would, in principle, lead to the justification of the unjust. Patriotism cannot mean defending whatever happens under our flag. It must mean defending whatever is consistent with what our flag ought to symbolize.

I don't agree with the first portion of your post and my gut won't allow me to NOT be critical of this war and the Bush administration. If people sit back and are quiet, then that in itself is tacit approval. However, muddle, I agree that patriotism cannot mean defending whatever is dished out to us - which is my point exactly.

I'm going to contact Mrs. McEvoy and see what help she needs and I think the rest of us should do the same - to all the families in our community that have soldiers deployed. And I'll keep my politics to myself, when I meet her, and hope that she won't mind a liberal Democrat extending their help.

muddle's picture
Submitted by muddle on Sat, 12/29/2007 - 8:26am.

Are you sure you picked up the whole context of what I said? (Why the elipses, which excludes the whole thought, and results in your having something with which to "disagree"?)


Floor Mosaic, 3rd cent. church, North end Sea oif Galilee

JeffC's picture
Submitted by JeffC on Fri, 12/28/2007 - 10:16pm.

Please consider pinkst from her post here. I believe that she is expressing more than is being said when she writes, “is not going to make husband who is a 20 year veteran walk again” and “I don't care if bush lie about the war or not”. She does not want her mind changed and does not want to hear that a sacrifice has been for nothing. A lot of people are in the same position although hopefully less personally affected. They supported the war and cheered it on. Now that the war has turned out like it has, they are in the position of either admitting a mistake which has caused untold grief to many families or, at best, realizing they were duped or lied to. There are several ways to confront this; the most obvious here is some variation of: “if you don’t support the war you don’t support the troops”. Either that or, “now that we are in it we must support it”. Both excellent arguments to quiet dissent or, if you accept either argument, to make everybody complicit in this tragic war by demanding everyone’s support.

Facts do not matter. We’ve all heard that the war is creating more terrorists, acting like a magnet for them, providing terrorist with a training ground, etc. People will insist that Saddam was involved in 9/11. He had WMD’s. Show them the dates that the weapon inspectors were removed because the US was going to invade and they will deny that the weapons inspectors were there then. To be swayed by facts or to agree now that the war was useless and has done far more damage than it stopped is to admit that they were wrong and because of their support people have died and will continue to die for nothing but a political statement. It is not going to happen anytime soon.

Denial is only now giving way to anger. There is a long way to go. Don’t argue with pinkst. There is no upside to challenging her coping mechanism and no reason to do so.

Submitted by Davids mom on Fri, 12/28/2007 - 6:33pm.

United we stand; Divided we fall. Gratitude to your husband for his sacrifice for our freedom. . . and our right to free speech and the right to dissent. GO AMERICA!!

Mike King's picture
Submitted by Mike King on Fri, 12/28/2007 - 2:52pm.

the war he /she is fighting is real while those who sit back and offer critiques either pro or con. The suffering, pain, loss, and even the daily boredom are real world experiences for those serving. So please, do not dishonor their sacrifice by claiming their Commander In Chief lied or the rationale behind their deployment was flawed. History will make that determination, not your opinion.
Get involved locally in some service venture that will take up some of your time, and I believe that will still a small amount of your hostility toward what you perceive to be unjust.

Main Stream's picture
Submitted by Main Stream on Fri, 12/28/2007 - 3:25pm.

...or to ask questions about the war's justness or validity. If, by voicing counter opinions and demanding the truth about this war, it helps to bring the soldiers home quicker - then I see this as a positive thing to do - even in this public forum. If the anger, felt by many American's and the world, regarding this war, prevents another unust war to occur, then I see this as a positive also. Dissension is not unpolitical, or dishonoring a soldier. Our political leaders should always be questioned for their actions, if they are found to be dishonest, unjust or illegal. Whether in time of war, or not.

Mike King's picture
Submitted by Mike King on Fri, 12/28/2007 - 3:52pm.

you feel that you are not being a disservice to those deployed but consider that the Congress of the United States from both sides of the aisle voted to send them. Further, they continue to fund their efforts despite the rhetoric from a vocal few. That said, the decision was made by our electorate and right or wrong, we as Americans, must get behind those serving to insure they are both honored and that their sacrifice was not in vain.
History is very brunt when political or idealistic views get in the way of realism. Remember 1976 and the "killing fields" or perhaps those who perished as so called "boat people?". Once engaged in hostilities, their can be but one winning side and while I understand your point of view, I would suggest that together, we find such a means to an end. How can we as a nation accept defeat and tell the widows and orphans of this conflict that we simply made a mistake and their loss was in vain?
Wars are not fought by those who make these decisions, nor will they ever be. Only in rare circumstances are the family members of decision makers involved. It's not perfect, but it's where we are.

muddle's picture
Submitted by muddle on Fri, 12/28/2007 - 3:43pm.

I find that I must agree with the basic idea. We do not want to put ourselves in a position of saying that, regardless of the circumstances of our nation's involvement in a war, we must not be critical. This would, in principle, lead to the justification of the unjust. Patriotism cannot mean defending whatever happens under our flag. It must mean defending whatever is consistent with what our flag ought to symbolize.

Note that the point is purely formal. By itself it oimplies nothing about what should be our attitude toward the Iraq war. To settle that matter is to ask whether our involvement there is consistent with the fundamental princples that we espouse.

Here's a great and relevant quote from Chesterton on the matter:

"A man who says that no patriot should attack the Boer War until it is over is not worth answering intelligently; he is saying that no good son should warn his mother off a cliff until she has fallen over it."


Floor Mosaic, 3rd cent. church, North end Sea oif Galilee

Mike King's picture
Submitted by Mike King on Fri, 12/28/2007 - 4:08pm.

You are to be commended for the quote and the philisophical position of defending what we as a nation represent. It is a matter of those we elect to make such decisions and then holding them responsible. Perhaps most elected officials have spent too much time in their seats of power and with the tenures of the average Congressman or Senator, I would suggest that a discussion of term limits for these guys be raised.
I leave you with yet another quote from an unknown author that I picked up several years ago: "For those who have fought and almost died, life has a flavor the protected will never know."

Submitted by Nitpickers on Fri, 12/28/2007 - 3:25pm.

Can't wait for history to trip up leader fools!
Just more young guys (who carry the rifles) will die.
They aren't fools of course but just patriotic kids, bumbling away.
I was one once.

other_side_trax's picture
Submitted by other_side_trax on Fri, 12/28/2007 - 12:45pm.

Your comments on this blog are about as welcome as a turd in a punch bowl. Talk about insensitive! Here we have a family who is missing their deployed Soldier and all you can do is rant the liberal talking points. You are not sickened, you are just sick. You and Cindy Sheehan make me want to puke. Because neither of you have any idea the sacrifice Soldiers make on your behalf. You claim to sympathize, but in reality, it's just fodder for your talking points. Take your comments somewhere else. They have no place as a response to this family. Better yet, why don't you join the group of whackos who currently protest at Soldiers gravesides . . . you deserve each other.

John Stuart Mill said it best centuries ago . .
"War is an ugly thing, but not the ugliest of things. The decayed and degraded state of moral and patriotic feeling which thinks that nothing is worth war is much worse. The person who has nothing for which he is willing to fight, nothing which is more important than his own personal safety, is a miserable creature and has no chance of being free unless made and kept so by the exertions of better men than himself."
John Stuart Mill
English economist & philosopher (1806 - 1873)

From the other side of the tracks (and yes, I have served in Iraq)

McGannahan Skjellyfetti's picture
Submitted by McGannahan Skje... on Fri, 12/28/2007 - 2:37pm.

There you go again in your grand tradition of name calling.

Several centuries prior to Mr. Mill, Thucydides said it even better. Quoting a Spartan King he said, "The nation that makes a great distinction between its scholars and its warriors will have its thinking done by cowards and its fighting done by fools." Now, I'm not saying that the soldiers serving in Iraq and elsewhere today are fools, not by any stretch; however, we all must stop and REALLY think about all of this and not blindly and idly stand by while our current leaders make a mockery of our great nation and its laws AND the rest of the world, free or otherwise loses all respect for this great nation of ALL OF OURS. Before we become a once great nation.

"everybody's dancin' in a ring around the sun"

Sniffle2's picture
Submitted by Sniffle2 on Fri, 12/28/2007 - 2:33pm.

Your whining to the contrary to the contrary notwithstanding, you did make personal attrax on MainStream.

You didn't like what he had to say so you attempted to demonize him by equating him with the Westboro church morans.

You sure seem to have anger management issues.

muddle's picture
Submitted by muddle on Fri, 12/28/2007 - 3:14pm.

Is it just me, or is there a real resemblance between Sniffle2's avatar and Father Epps? (Maybe Father Epps in a very bad mood or Father Epps on steroids or Father Epps portrayed by a Pixar character?)


Floor Mosaic, 3rd cent. church, North end Sea oif Galilee

Sniffle2's picture
Submitted by Sniffle2 on Fri, 12/28/2007 - 3:52pm.

Well muddle, I grew some facial hair back at the start of football season and I had a couple of folks in PTC ask me if I was the good Father. Yikes!

I immediately invested in some Just-For-Men medium brown and cut it down to a goatee. I'm totally clean shaven now as of Christmas morning so perhaps I should donate this avatar to the Citizen's resident babblin' bishop. Eye-wink

Submitted by Proud_to_be_in_... on Fri, 12/28/2007 - 2:14pm.

Your point about Main Stream's comment being inappropriate couldn't be more appropriate - He's off the point of the original message completely. I didn't see it as a name calling session - just pointing out that his comment was misplaced. We should all be thankful for our freedom.

Main Stream's picture
Submitted by Main Stream on Fri, 12/28/2007 - 2:05pm.

Since you have served in Iraq, I do hope that you have helped families who have a loved one serving. Mrs. McEvoy's daughter is right - we should be helping those who have someone deployed over there, so please, trax, go help her with her yardwork! I may do the same.

My anger rages because I hear stories of soldiers committing suicide in Iraq, because soldiers are coming home physically maimed or insane and our government turns their back on them. I'm enraged because Bush has unleashed terrorism in Iraq, that was never there in the first place and that he had a 'mission' to uncover WMD's, that were never found, and then he changes his 'mission' to be one of the 'betterment of Iraq - to rid them of Saddam.' And our soldiers are his pawns - and yes, that sickens me. If Iraq had been behind 9/11, then yes, that would have been a reason to go to war. But we all know that Iraq had nothing to do with 9/11.

And yes, it sickens me that there are still 'sheeple' like you in this country that continue to hail Bush and his Administration. Yes, 'war is an ugly thing...' made uglier when it is unjust, illegal, and uncalled for.

REPUBLICAN Ron Paul said it best, when he voted AGAINST the Iraq resolution:


Submitted by daisyheadmaisy on Fri, 12/28/2007 - 1:13pm.

Nothing like a personal attack that I think is uncalled for on this forum.

Marvena Hammond said it best decades ago:
"You can say anything to anyone, it's just the way you say it that makes the difference."

other_side_trax's picture
Submitted by other_side_trax on Fri, 12/28/2007 - 1:21pm.

If Main Stream decides to take it personally, that's MS's problem. I attacked the MS's comments which are entirely inapropriate. I did not name call. Just made comparisons. From experience.

If you can't take the heat, stay out of the kitchen!

From the other side of the tracks

Submitted by daisyheadmaisy on Fri, 12/28/2007 - 2:40pm.

I think calling someone a "miserable creature" is name-calling.

You and I have very different views politically, and that's fine. I'm not here to change your mind, nor will you change mine. I AM entitled to my viewpoint, just as you are entitled to yours, but a difference of opinion doesn't justify you unloading on anyone else by telling them their opinion is not welcomed here, whether it be in this particular blog or another. Hopefully we're all adults here and can pull together to help this family.

The point at hand should be to address this daughter's legitimate concern that her church and community have not shown her father nor her family any support that they need during this time and that's something we all should be ashamed of.

Submitted by skyspy on Wed, 12/26/2007 - 8:07pm.

You really thought your "church family" was going to care and help??

Thats crazy.

Submitted by Vernon on Wed, 12/26/2007 - 1:21pm.

As someone from the south, I apoligize for the actions and inactions of those you mentioned. Most of the Peachtree City folks are not true southerners, just a bunch of stuck up whiney brats. Thank your family for their sacrifice and thank you for yours as well.

MainframeComputerGuy's picture
Submitted by MainframeComputerGuy on Fri, 12/28/2007 - 12:10am.

As someone who has only lived here in Jojah for the last seven years I can empathize with your plight. However, I think that the real "whiney brats" here are the "true Southerners" who think they're better than everyone else, are definitely holier than thou and just love yammering about how people from everyplace else have ruined their backwoods Eden. Keep listening for the banjo music . . .

Main Stream's picture
Submitted by Main Stream on Wed, 12/26/2007 - 2:38pm.

...just a bunch of stuck up whiney brats.

Was that really necessary? Yes, a 'true southerner' speaks.

(makes me want to move back to the west - I thought the Civil War ended already)

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