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Second favorite preacher I first met Mary Ann in the early to mid-1980s. She was married to a chiropractor named Robert Calhoun. They both began to attend services at the church I served at the time and my middle son, John, became fast friends with her youngest son Greg. In fact, if John was missing, he was probably at the Calhouns and it was known that her door was always open to the neighborhood kids. Dr. Bob used to say, as he left Sunday services, “You know, you’re my second favorite preacher.” One day, I asked him, “So, who’s your favorite preacher?” Without batting an eye, he replied, “Kenneth Copeland.” Well, it’s hard to compete with an internationally known televangelist, so I was content to be number two. Sometime later, Dr. Bob had a stroke that nearly killed him. When he woke up in ICU, I was there at his side. “What happened? Did I have a stroke?” he asked. “Yes, Bob, you did.” “How bad is it?” he asked. “You are alive, and that’s a good thing,” I answered. “What time is it?” he eventually inquired. “Bob, it’s about 2 in the morning.” Puzzled, he said, “What are you doing here?” Smiling, I replied, “I had to come, Bob. Kenneth Copeland couldn’t make it.” After that night, Kenneth Copeland was Bob Calhoun’s second favorite preacher. Although he recovered and even returned to work, Bob died sometime later. Mary Ann was grief-stricken and I saw the light go out in her eyes and life. I changed churches and she moved on. Then, years later, in 1997, she called and excitedly told me about a man she had met and waned to know if I would marry the two of them. I wasn’t sure about this guy. He was so unlike Bob. A veteran of the U.S. Army, where he served three tours in Vietnam with Special Forces (also commonly known as the “Green Berets”), Grady Black was a warrior. He received two purple hearts for wounds received in combat and earned the Bronze Star, America’s fourth highest award for “bravery, heroism, or meritorious service.” Grady received his for an act of combat heroism. He had worked all over the globe serving the Army and the government. He was a nice guy, and I did marry them, but...I still wasn’t sure... I couldn’t have been more wrong. Grady adored, admired, and doted on Mary Ann. Over time, Mary Ann’s quiet ways and sweet spirit melted the heart and demeanor of her husband. Those who do not know of Grady’s warrior career would describe him as a kind, gentle, and compassionate man. Grady gives all the credit to Mary Ann. About five years ago, Mary Ann became quite ill with a variety of ailments that, like dominoes, came one after the other. Through it all, Grady was there by her side caring for her with concern and caring. Grady began to attend our church and was soon one of our most regular and faithful members. For the most part, Mary Ann was too ill to leave the house. In fact, I thought we had lost her last spring when she spent nearly a month in ICU. At all hours of the days or night, Grady was with her. Evidently, some of his “warrior spirit” rubbed off on her became she rallied and was released from the hospital. In September, she attended the ordination of my oldest son, Jason, to the diaconate. In October, she and Grady were received as confirmed members of our church by our bishop. On Dec. 18, my wife’s birthday, she quietly went to sleep and woke up in Heaven. She was 59. The church was packed that next Friday morning with people that Mary Ann had touched over the years. People from Mary Ann’s high school days, friends of the three sons, church members, and some warrior friends of Grady’s who had come to love this quiet, sweet, unassuming lady were all present. Her mother, who had just lost her husband a few months prior, was there, along with two brothers, five grand-children, and other relatives and in-laws. I was there, too, as officiating pastor and as grieving friend. It’s possible that some people can go through their whole life and never touch the hearts of other people. Not Mary Ann Brogden Black. Those who knew her said that she never complained about the unfairness of her situation, never spoke a harsh word about another person, never swore, and sought out ways to help others. In other words, she was a “giver.” On Sunday, Dec. 17, our church had a covered dish Christmas party. That afternoon, Mary Ann spent three hours cooking a dish that would take a healthy person 20 minutes to prepare. She knew that she was too sick to attend but she wanted Grady to go and she wanted to be able to share something of herself. So, she cooked a meal that others would eat. It’s the last thing she ever did. But, she was like that. In a world where people are so concerned about their own needs and greeds, Mary Ann was a rarity. She will not easily be replaced. She will not be forgotten. login to post comments | Father David Epps's blog
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