Wednesday, July 16, 2003

Cal, I wonder if you also need to confess to being a SUV Simpleton? Reading between the lines of your claim to innocent road rage, one can't help being suspicious that a deeper-seated problem of horsepower-hog syndrome is latent.

You might be a SUV Simpleton if:

· You've succumbed to Detroit's latest sucker-punch to American consumers and bought one of those slick, gas-guzzling, overpriced piles of junk.

· You think the left lane should be reserved for anything over 85 mph.

· Your IQ-to-horsepower ratio is way out of balance.

· You think your superior intellect entitles you to ignore traffic laws at will.

· You think the continued slaughter on our highways is just the price we must pay for getting you hurriedly to your destination, however unimportant that tee-time may really be in the long run.

Cal, whether or not you personally qualify as a SUV Simpleton, or suffer from horsepower-hog syndrome, your column will likely be taken as encouragement by the many Fayette County "citizens" who do qualify/suffer. And, that is really unfortunate.

Slow down, man! That 55 mph "Left Lane Laggard" may save your life! People always in a big rush, and/or full of angst, often get to their final destination way ahead of schedule.

Al Camp

Fayetteville, Ga.

[The editor replies: I can only dream of road-hogging, massively macho SUVs. Sadly I travel incognito in a seriously underpowered soccer-mom-type minivan.]