By Rick Ryckeley
Fayette County Fire & Emergency Services

This old man sat down and talked to me the other day an old man that I haven't seen for some time. He asked me if I had time to spare from my busy life to spend some time with him.

He began to talk about his life that has spanned some 75 years. The conversation lasted for many hours, and when it was through, I saw the old man in a way I've never seen him before.

He talked to me about being the star running back for the local high school, Boys High. Back in the 1940s, there were only two high schools in Atlanta Boys High and Tech High. He earned a four-year football scholarship to Auburn University. So for four years, he played football for Auburn, and each year his right ankle was broken before the second game.

In his junior year, he met his future wife, also a student at the university. Upon graduation, they were married; six months later he was drafted into the army. Serving two tours of duty, their first son was born in Germany.

The old man and his wife came back to Georgia to raise their son. He took a part-time job with his brother selling bedspreads door to door. His wife made their small apartment into a home.

They had additional children - a daughter and a son, and were going to adopt triplets when his wife was told she was going to have twin boys. He said he still regrets not also adopting the triplets "a man is truly rich when he has children."

He spoke of their lives together, of the part-time job he and his wife turned into a business that lasted for some 34 years. He talked of the real estate empire they had amassed and their plans for retirement.

He told me how he taught the children the value of a dollar by letting them shine his Sunday shoes for a quarter. With five children, the old man said he always had the shiniest shoes in church.

He taught his sons how to use a hammer, saw, and nails. His eldest son grew up and used those skills he learned as a boy to become a builder of custom homes.

He taught the children to respect nature and to value the environment. His only daughter grew up and protects the environment through her job as a marine biologist.

He taught them about honor and serving one's country, to be involved in something bigger than oneself. The oldest twin retired a lieutenant colonel from the Air Force after 20 years of dedicated service.

He taught the children the important things about life: not to lie, cheat or steal, respect others, and give back to the community in which you live. His youngest son grew up to be a firefighter and volunteers 20 hours a week for community causes.

He told me about his family's life together, the good times and the bad. How in 1974 they almost lost everything everything but each other. He found out then that family was really all that they needed. Their love for each other grew stronger than ever that year.

I asked him, "What is the greatest marvel you've seen over the last 75-plus years?"

Without hesitation he said, "The birth of our five children."

"And the worst thing you have seen?"

"The death of one," he replied. "I've seen the coming of grandchildren (four to date) and the deaths of both of our parents. But through it all, our love for each other and faith in God is what made each day special. With my Barbara each day was worth living. Young folks today have forgotten what is really important about being married, and that's being together."

We talked until dark, until my wife called us in for dinner. As I helped him up out of the rocking chair, he said, "Son, don't work so hard. You have people who love you waiting at home. You need to spend time with them now because retirement might not ever come."

After dinner he spoke again of the marriage that spanned some 33 years. One year before retirement, cancer took his beloved. He said he doesn't talk about it too often it hurts him to remember their lives together. I asked, "How can you forget? Remembering is the only way of keeping her alive."

The old man looked down, wiped his blue eyes and said, "You're right. A big part of me died that day I laid my Barbara to rest. I thought I would never find another sole mate so I moved away."

He moved far away from Georgia, moved away from the memories of her and their lives together. He moved to Florida and retired there alone.

Years went by before he could let another woman into his life. I asked him, "Why did you get married again?"

He said, "Man was not meant to be alone."

He had found another soul mate, not the same, but different. She has created a new spirit of love, a spark of life he thought was gone forever. This old man once again is happy.

The twinkle in his blue eyes is not as bright as I remember. His hair has turned a silvery gray, he doesn't walk as fast as he used to, and sometimes he doesn't hear all of what you have to say but that's okay.

My dad's still high up on the pedestal that I placed him on so many years ago. I pray he's with us for many years to come because we all still have a lot to learn from this old man.

Happy Father's Day, Dad.

[Rick Ryckeley is employed by the Fayette County Department of Fire and Emergency Services. He can be reached at saferick@bellsouth.net.]

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