Wednesday, February 28, 2001
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Wednesday, February 28, 2001 |
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Never-Ending Story of Bill-Hill By BILLY MURPHY We are in an infinite cycle. Bill Clinton won't go away because the stories about Bill Clinton not going away will not go away. And thus I am continuing the never-ending circle of Bill. Why won't people let him go? Like all bad relationships there is bond of co-dependency between our ex-president and the peoples of our nation that would make feuding trailer-park couples on "Jerry Springer" look like amateurs. I think Bill is owed an apology. And some money. Half the pundits around wouldn't have the career of a Napster programmer today if not for the Willie City Madman. The likes of Rush Limbaugh, or Hillary for that matter, are where they are due to their reliance on Bill, the political equivalent to Elvis Presley. (Bill's not even dead, yet there are already McDonalds' sightings from Kalamazoo to Birmingham what that really was him?) Everyone surrounding Bill has already gotten their pink Cadillac. Our country seems to be like the family who sits around and talks incessantly about the bad-apple cousin in the state penitentiary because it is the one thing they all have in common that makes them feel superior, good, or at least "not that embarrassingly stupid." We are also both appalled and jealous that Bill has gotten away with things we are only too chicken to try. Teflon man? Heck, Clinton is the stuff the pot is made of, where they cook the Teflon. Poor Dubya. Do you think that stalker laws could be applied to Bill Clinton? Through his actions, just since he has been out of office, Bill has cast a shadow over every deed our new president has done. Forget about inclusive appointments, tax cuts, or wars in the Gulf. Didn't you hear? Clinton stole a chifforobe! With every door that George W. enters, you can feel the hairs on his neck stand in paranoia to the attention given to his predecessor's new business cards. You can't even turn on the radio without some song playing that "came from a group that once recorded a song penned by Denise Rich, wife of Mark Rich who was indecently given an eleventh hour pardon by President Clinton." Can you see our new President doing word association with his psychiatrist over all this nonsense? Psychiatrist: "Dog." Bush: "Buddy." Psychiatrist: "Cat." Bush: "Socks." Psychiatrist: "Snake." Bush: "Hillary." Psychiatrist: "Music." Bush: "Saxophone." Psychiatrist: "Book." Bush: "Library." Psychiatrist: "Rich." Bush: "Mark." Psychiatrist: "Poor." Bush: "Gore." Psychiatrist: "Water." Bush: "White." Psychiatrist: "Moon." Bush: "Starr." Psychiatrist: "Office." Bush: "Monica." Psychiatrist: "Floor." Bush: "Monica." Psychiatrist: "We're out of time, you need to go." Bush: "Monica." Psychiatrist: "No, President Bush, we are finished and out of time." Bush: "Pardon?" Psychiatrist: "Denise Rich!" In the end, there will be no end to the William Jefferson Clinton story. He will surely outlive us all to produce movies, write books and probably star in his own TV show called, "Survivor, the Early Years." [Visit Billy Murphy on the Internet at http://ebilly.net.]
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