To Ms. Ronda Rich, concerning your recent column about mastering the art of conversation and how so many people fail at this, I wanted to respond.

I know your M.O. and genre is finding the humor and (God forbid I say) the superiority in Southerners and their elegant classy lifestyle, but I think you did sound a bit smug and insensitive toward people who have not had your travel and social advantages in which to learn and practice the “fine art of conversation.”

I’m sure (almost) your intentions were to be humorous but just in case you are uninformed there are people out there who suffer from physical and mental disabilities that impact their conversational and social skills.

In the case of a variation of autism called P.D.D. (pervasive delayed development) and Asperger’s syndrome, the hallmarks are poor to no eye contact, poor processing problems impacting whether they heard or processed your name and address and difficulty indulging in chit-chat.

And no, you wouldn’t necessarily know that these people had a variation of autism; some of them are highly intelligent and high-functioning. Computer mogul Bill Gates is rumored to have a variation of Asperger’s syndrome. It’s extremely hard for AS people to converse and socialize normally.

Also, there are the physical problems such as hearing problems and limp handshake can be caused by neurological problems such as brain damage and strokes.

I do agree with your tips on making good conversation. I’d add also that people who have traveled a lot and lived in many different areas do better with this. Having an interest in and caring about people is very important too.

Listening well, I agree, is a remarkable skill. Most people’s mouths are so in constant motion that they totally ignore the person listening to them and bearing up under their verbal onslaught. We, as a society and people, are suffering from a lack of concern and interest in our fellow man.

If, at these social gatherings, you can find a person who will listen to you, it is rare. If they did; they might hear an interesting life story, find a new friend and escape the boredom of these events.

Large noisy social gatherings with a lot of people moving in and out can contribute to what you call poor conversational skills. It’s not always easy to hear a person’s name and address correctly in the the first place and there’s no time for a serious in-depth conversation.

These gatherings are more like political events, in my opinion; see how many people you can meet and impress.

Maybe some of these Southerners you think who are “spawned by aliens” would be okay in a sit-down, relaxed one-on-one setting.

P.J. Morris
Fayetteville, Ga.

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