Love health ‘reform’? Now global warming

Tue, 09/01/2009 - 3:24pm
By: Letters to the ...

So, here we are in the middle of healthcare-palooza. Has anyone considered that there are other things still moving forward? Has anybody considered that cap and trade hasn’t even come up yet? When the non-servants return to Washington, remember the name Ban Ki Moon. You have a ton of respect for Ban Ki Moon, don’t you?

Ban Ki Moon is the secretary general of the United Nations and therefore the world’s foremost authority on everything, right? Really — security, prosperity, love, peace, and of course, global warming. Just look at how peaceful the world has turned since Ban Ki took charge.

You know what the problem is with the U.N.? It hasn’t fully been implemented. We haven’t given them enough power. If we could just give them more power, then all that corruption and ineptness would just go away.

Take healthcare, for instance. Only one-third of humans are living under universal healthcare. If we could just get that up to 100 percent, it would be fantastic. If we can just do it this time with more money and more research, it would be perfect.

How great could the Soviet Union have been if it wasn’t for those 50 million people that were standing in the way of Joseph Stalin? He had to waste so much time and energy killing all of those folks that it kept him from other important duties. Of course, Stalin was a big fan of Karl Marx who, in turn, was a big believer in eliminating 20-to-30 percent of the population in order to maintain control (if you know what I mean).

Anyway, back to Ban Ki Moon. Moon believes we’re now only four months away from permanently destroying the Earth. If we don’t save it in the next four months, then the sun will turn the Earth into a giant ice cream cone. Of course, the sun has nothing to do with it, it’s the CO2. That 2 million degree burning orb in the sky, it’s just a glow. Really?

Debbie Stabenow (Fairness Doctrine leader making sure radio station licenses are only given to progressives, like her husband) says climate change is very real. “Global warming creates volatility. I feel it when I’m flying. The storms are more volatile. We are paying the price in more hurricanes and tornadoes” (Of course, all of this has been disproven, but let’s not inject facts into this discussion). However, she “feels it” when she’s flying.

Strangely enough, flying higher had nothing to do with getting closer to the sun. No, that’s crazy talk. It’s just that she was flying in the fumes of all of the cars that caused her to be hotter. Now, I’m not a pilot, but I think all you have to do is reach up and turn that little knob and more air will come out.

So, in the midst of our concerns with healthcare reform, the U.N., the Obama administration (including those crazy czars), and the green movement have pretty much come to this conclusion with regards to global warming: instead of getting one of those little air conditioning thingies or anything like that, we should just destroy the monetary system of the entire world. That’s fantastic.

Dave Edinger

Peachtree City, Ga.

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