Harrison Ford’s newest film, “Firewall,” tells the tale of bank robbers living in the age of modern technology. (Note: this review contains some spoiler information, but if you’ve seen the previews and know that Harrison Ford plays the hero, you won’t be surprised by the outcome).

Jack Stanfield (Ford) is a family man and a head security advisor at a mid-sized bank. After work one night, Jack is invited to have a drink with a coworker and a man, Bill Cox, who are interested in starting a business with Jack. Meanwhile, Jack's home is being invaded and his family is being tied up and held hostage. It turns out that Mr. Cox isn’t in the banking business after all; he’s the smooth-talking, heartless ringleader of the kidnappers who have Jack’s family, and he is driven by nothing more than his own greed.

Cox takes Jack back to his home where he threatens the whole family with bodily injury and even death if Jack doesn’t do as he is told. It’s not until the next day while at work (rigged up with a microphone and a 007-esque camera-pen with a gunman waiting outside for him) that Jack is told why his family has been taken hostage: he must help them steal $100 million from the bank.

After several failed attempts at duping the criminals, Jack manages to find a way around his own iron-clad security system using nothing more than a part from his home fax machine, a few cables and his daughter’s pink iPod Mini.

In a less-than-shocking turn of events, the kidnappers go back on their promise to release his family and instead load them in a van headed for the middle of nowhere to get rid of them. Jack must come to the rescue to save his family (and their dog) from imminent ruin by beating the kidnappers at their own game.

Where do I begin with what is wrong with this film? One of Jack’s key personality traits that the film tries to get across to audiences is that he is a “family man,” first and foremost. I guess this is so that later in the film we’ll believe that he’ll find extraordinary strength (because of this deep commitment to family) to save them since he would clearly not be capable of some of his actions if it weren’t for this driving force. However, the first few minutes of the film, where Jack is shown in the normal family morning routine, I couldn’t decide if Jack was a stepfather to his two children or if his adolescent daughter calling him “Jack” was merely thrown in there to display teenage attitude.

The film puts so much energy into making technology scary, because of how “bad people” can use it against us, that it ends up being laughable. Although I am constantly aware of the dangers of identity theft, etc., I quit allowing movies to freak me out about technology after “The Net” came out in 1995. Of course, technology is also touted as a saving grace in this film in the form of a GPS navigational doggie collar.

Another point of contention I have is that Harrison Ford is now a 63-year-old man. He plays a businessman, not a Marine, so it’s hard for me to suspend my disbelief while watching him single-handedly take down four men in possession of automatic weapons.

Overall, while there are many, many things to make fun of in this film, it’s not the worst movie I’ve ever seen. I did laugh out loud occasionally (usually in moments that I don’t think were meant to be funny). There are some fairly violent sequences which parents should be aware of if their kids are wanting to see it. “Firewall” is a film you’ll probably catch some Saturday afternoon on TBS while doing laundry, and I wouldn’t recommend investing much more time or money than that into seeing it.

**

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