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Dear Father Paul

Dear Father Paul: My mom lives in another state. She has been hospitalized three times in the last year or so. Her pastor (she is a long-time active member in her church) didn't visit her even one time while she was in the hospital. She is hurt (not mad) and discouraged about her church and keeps asking me what I think. — Jan, Fayetteville.

Dear Jan: There is not much I can say to defend her pastor unless (and its unlikely) the pastor didn't know that she was in the hospital. You didn't say how big the church is; some larger church pastors have delegated hospital visits to associate pastors. If that happened, its possible that the associate just "dropped the ball."

A pastor I know (not from this area) told me once that he just "hates to make hospital visits" and avoids them whenever possible. I'm afraid I lost it a little when I told him that if that's true, he needed to "do everyone a favor and get out of the ministry." Seriously, the ministry is all about being a "spiritual father" as the apostle Paul spoke of the young Timothy. What father, knowing his child was sick and hospitalized, would not drop everything and go see his son or daughter? Most pastors (me included) love to make hospital visits. It's a time when we are urgently needed and being needed is why most of us went in the ministry in the first place.

Send your mom a copy of this column and encourage her to mail it to her pastor.

Dear Father Paul: Is suicide a sin? Will a person who commits suicide go to hell? — Alfred, Fayetteville.

Dear Alfred: I'll answer your second question first. I honestly do not know; I am not God! Having said that, I would not want to take a chance and find out — seriously! The Bible does say in Revelation 21:8 that "murderers (does this include those who murder themselves?) will take their place in the fiery lake of burning sulfur" (hell).

There is no question, however, that suicide is a sin. The person doing so is taking unto themselves something that God reserves for himself alone — namely the beginning and end of human life. Ending unwanted human life is a huge issue today as we can see in the current fight over abortion and euthanasia. Self-directed death (a euphemism for suicide) is being debated nationally as well. There is currently an Oregon case before the U.S. Supreme Court on this very issue. We know as well that the 6th Commandment is "Do not kill (murder)," so again, yes, suicide IS a sin.

Some would argue that a person who commits suicide is mentally ill and thus not responsible for his or her actions. That is an argument that certainly makes sense, but again, I would not want to take the chance.

Having dealt with suicide over the years, the worst thing about it is that (in my experience) it is a cowardly act that is absolutely devastating and hurtful (I'm talking long time wounds here) to those people close to the person who commits suicide. Often these are children. If, by even the slightest chance, any person reading this is contemplating suicide, DON'T DO IT. E-mail me at the address at the end of this article. We need to talk. You do not need to give me your name.rson who commits suicide. Often these are children. If, by even the slightest chance, any person reading this is contemplating suicide, DON'T DO IT. E-mail me at the address at the end of this article. We need to talk. You do not need to give me your name.

Father Paul Massey will answer your question in the newspaper. Write him at P.O. Box 510, Fayetteville, GA 30214 or paulmassey@earthlink.net.