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Old socks, new socks, lost socks ... and holy socks

I like socks. I like to buy socks. I like to buy socks in bundles. Once you purchase them, you bring them home and then what? You are faced with an immediate dilemma. Should I put my new socks in with all the old socks?

Old socks. Now, there’s a real dilemma. What do you do with old socks? Old socks could be compared with old relationships. As I look into my old socks drawer, I see socks I have not worn in more than a year, if not years. Yet, there they are. Still taking up space in my drawer. So much space I don’t have room for my new socks.

As I look into the drawer I can’t tell which socks are black, which are blue, and which are brown. If it’s a cloudy day, I am in real trouble. Why, I could put on brown socks and wear a black suit. I believe every sock should be identified at the toe as to its color. Sure would help me and my declining visual color strength.

Look a bit longer in that old sock drawer and you will discover lonely socks. You know the ones. That’s the pair of socks you submitted to the family laundry system and only one came back. “Where’s my other sock?’ is a common refrain in households around the world. Most every home has a sock monster, totally dependent on socks for existence. That’s where the socks go. They don’t go off to sock heaven; they are eaten by the sock monster.

Lonely socks at times resemble a man or woman without their lifelong companion. Either through divorce or death, one sock is left. I suppose the challenge for that sock is to find another sock that looks the same.

I thought I had my sock crisis licked when I allocated two drawers for socks. One drawer for casual, everyday socks and another drawer for Sunday-go-to-meeting socks: you know. socks for funerals, weddings, and church. Over time, I’ve discovered that socks are herd animals. They like to be with other socks. Now, one drawer is stuffed full while the other drawer is barely empty. Could it be the socks or am I having a difficult time telling the difference between casual and formal?

A little more about socks and me. I like white socks. I like to wear them around the house without shoes. I am not the only one, am I? But white socks have a higher mortality rate than any other color. They disappear faster than any other sock. A friend of mine nailed the culprit one day when he found his children raiding his white socks on a regular basis. Heads up: white socks are not community property.

Socks become like members of the family. Some socks are just downright hard to throw away. Sure there is a little hole in the heel, but the toe section is fully in place and there’s nothing wrong with the leg portion. Who will know anyway? Wear that sucker until you feel leather!

No one will know until you are at a foot washing and someone wants to wash your feet. That happened to me while in Uganda last year. Out in the bush, I wanted to demonstrate the love of Jesus and asked one man if I could wash his feet. He took off his shoes and it was one of the holiest situations I had ever encountered. Proof, this subject of socks has a holy motif.

John Hatcher is pastor of Outreach International Center, 1091 South Jeff Davis Drive, Fayetteville, Georgia 30215. 770-719-0303