By DAVID EPPS
Pastor

According to the Oct. 20 issue of Coin World magazine, the federal government is spending 33 million dollars — that’s $33,000,000.00 — over a five-year period to promote the new Series 2004 $20 bill.
That’s right. The feds are spending $33 million to publicize the new $20 bill. My question is, “Why?” Isn’t that a bit like publicizing “air?”
It’s not like one has a choice about using the new bill. Personally, I like the new $20 bill. It has a smidgen of color and, I’m told, it’s much more difficult to counterfeit. Well, hooray, but spending $33 million to tell us about a bill that we have to use anyway? What’s the point? And this time, the Republicans can’t blame the Democrats for this taxpayer rip-off.
The new currency, cutely named “NexGen currency,” was introduced in October with the new $20 bill and new $50 and $100 bills will come into service over the next few years. The new bills feature new security measures and have new background colors of pastel green, peach, and blue.
According to Coin World , the $33 million contract went to a firm named Burson-Marsteller and will pay for:
• Market research used to develop and deploy resources for maximum reach and development (whatever that means).
• Development and distribution of training and public education materials in 22 languages.
• Direct outreach to businesses and organizations representing key cash-handling and consumer audiences.
• News media outreach to provide the news media with the information needed to accurately inform their audiences about the new currency (What? Free news releases won’t do the job?).
• Development of a new web site about the currency (Oh, please!).
• Placement of paid ads in magazines and trade publications (It’s true; I’ve seen full page color ads — the most expensive kind — in several big name magazines).
• Efforts will be made to encourage popular U. S. television programming to feature visuals and messages and the new money in their story lines.
Okay, fine. I don’t mind a new bill. If the U. S. government wants to make the American dollar look more like the Euro, that’s just peachy keen with me. Currency collectors will love it and the new “new” $20 bills do look better than the old “new” $20 bills.  And I realize that the “chad” incident of the last election proved to those in government that some Americans don’t have the good sense that God gave a goose. But why not just do a press conference and tell America about the new bills? Can’t Dan Rather, Ted Koppel, Shepard Smith, Wolf Blitzer, and Peter Jennings be trusted enough to just do a couple of stories about the new currency? Is it really necessary to spend mega millions on a harebrained campaign during these difficult economic times when lawmakers are arguing about the $87 billion dollars is being funneled to Iraq? Do we really need to blow an additional $33 million on “P.R.” for the new bills? Why aren’t the lawmakers arguing about that? Isn’t it enough to just put the new $20 bills in the banks and force us to use them? It’s always worked in the past, hasn’t it? Haven’t we quickly adjusted to using the new $20 bills that were introduced just a short time ago and are now becoming obsolete?
But here’s what really rots my socks. A friend of mine suffered a serious back injury while on active duty with the U. S. Navy a few years back. This service-connected disability has plagued him for years. Recently, he became much worse and was confined to his bed in sheer agony. He was told by one Veterans Administration Hospital official that he could be treated in Charleston, S.C., but there were 68 people ahead of him on the waiting list! So, while the feds fiddled, he languished in indescribable pain until a U. S. Congressman got involved and, as a result, he recently received surgery in a civilian hospital. And now we are told that our reservists returning from the war in Iraq are receiving inadequate medical treatment and are dwelling in sub-standard housing.
But be of good cheer; the country has a new rainbow $20 bill with pastel colors and the government is spending $33 million to tell you all about it. Oh, and I’m told that, so far, most vending machines won’t accept the new bills. Aren’t you proud?
[David Epps is rector of Christ the King Charismatic Episcopal Church, which meets at 8 a.m. and 10 a.m. Sundays on Ga. Highway 34 between Peachtree City and Newnan. He may be contacted at FatherDavidEpps@aol.com or at www.CTKCEC.org.]

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