Wednesday, August 6, 2003
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Wednesday, August 6, 2003 |
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Marriage should be a threesome By JOHN HATCHER Marriage is a holy estate. We don't say that birth is a holy estate. We don't say death is a holy estate. It's very interesting that for centuries the first words out of the Christian minister's mouth were, "marriage is a holy estate, ordained by God." And of course that's it. That's why marriage is a holy estate. God ordains it. It's the special state and station in life at which God decides to pour out his blessings on two people because of their covenant with each other and with him. Someone needs to tell every Tom, Dick, Harry, and Jennifer of Hollywood that marriage is a threesome: woman, man, and God. One does not tie the knot and break the knot at will. Someone else is involved here. He is God. It's his estate. That's the beauty and glory of marriage. It is of God. Two people can look into one another's eyes and make their covenant knowing full well that God well help them over the tough terrain in order to keep their covenant. Personally, I see why Jennifer Lopez changes husbands about as often as I change a/c filters. God's not on board. There's hardly a way two people can face the setbacks and disappointments of marriage without God's grace to forgive and forbear. Take for instance, that first year of marital bliss called the honeymoon period. If your first year was anything like what I experienced, you are thankful that the second year was better and the third year better than the second. That first year of surprises, adjustments, and realization that marriage is not a wedding can be shocking. Poor bride and groom exist for a few months in the la-la land of being the prince and princess with party after party, delicious food prepared just for them on the cruise, and all those gifts. But the hard realities of marriage sets in and one has to answer the difficult question night after night, "What are we going to have for supper?" Bills have to be paid. House cleaned. In-laws over for dinner. If a couple does not have God's grace working in their favor, there's every reason to believe it won't work. Too many factors already working against the poor couple. But with God's grace, Ah, that's the way to go. God's grace allows both husband and wife to understand that a spotless house is not the most important thing in the world. So what if his mother got down on her knees and cleaned the kitchen floor! The couple guided by God's grace knows their constant love needs more attention than the kitchen floor. God's grace attends every argument gently nudging each one to get it right before the sun goes down and they crawl into bed. The marriage bed was never designed for a volcano, but for two people to cave-in on one another after a long day. God's grace helps us to know that we may not always have the right slant to a situation and therefore should listen to our spouse. I sincerely encourage every married couple to begin living with the reality that marriage is God's holy estate. It's not just about you and him or you and her. It's about the big him and he has a big stake in your marriage. You may bring another soul into this world and you will need all his help possible. He can help you parent your children by his grace: the only way to parent. Ask God. He knows. That's how he has related to you and me all these years. John Hatcher is pastor of Outreach International Center 1091 South Jeff Davis Drive Fayetteville, Georgia 30215 770-719-0303 |
