Wednesday, January 1, 2003

My wife and I attended a get-together of church friends the other night. My wife and I only knew only about half of them. The hosts served some of the most memorable beef tenderloin roast and mashed potatoes and gravy I've ever had.

As the evening wore on the host said that there was a lot of beef left over. She set out four wrapped plates of food that contained the delicious main course. The people standing closest to the plates quickly snapped up the first three of these plates.

As I moved toward the last plate, I noticed that Jerry was also moving toward the plate. I had never met Jerry before that night; he and his wife were one of many black families that made up our church's congregation.

We both insisted that the other person take the plate. But then I said, "You have it, you need it more." To this he said: "What do you mean, 'I need it more'?" And I said something like, "Well, this is very high quality meat, you probably can't afford to eat like this very often."

He seemed offended and said, "How do you know I can't afford to eat like this, you've just met me?" To which I said, "You've got me there, I really don't know, but because you are black I assumed you would be of modest means."

Jerry then proceeded to lecture me about prejudice, etc. and added that if I cared to compare tax returns with him, we'd find out who was more needy, etc. As it turns out, Jerry owns a successful car dealership in a nearby suburb. I apologized and told him that I didn't mean to offend him, in fact my only intention was to be polite. Although my apology was accepted, it was still very awkward after that.

I was only trying to be nice to this guy I'd just met. I know now that my assumption was wrong but why did he find my generous offer offensive? (After reflecting on this question for a minute, please read on.)

Sometimes an analogy can be an effective means of communication. The above scenario I just painted is fictitious, not a word of it really happened. It is merely a tool to draw a comparison to the darker side of affirmative action.

Just as in the above example, affirmative action seeks to reward people solely because of a person's membership in a particular group.

With all the charges of racism hurled at Republicans lately, it is important to remember that it is primarily the Democrat Party which seeks to implement race-, ethnic- and gender-based discrimination in our laws. It is primarily the Republicans who seek to reward people based on individual merit or need.

Ken Faber

Peachtree City