Wednesday, October 11, 2000
Wednesday, October 11, 2000 |
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Must see TV or musty TV - you decide By MICHAEL BOYLAN Now that the Braves have choked yet again, we can turn our focus to the fall season of television. Each year, dozens of new shows are created in the hopes that one of them will be at least a moderate hit. Some networks bring back some of television's most memorable characters, while others mimic already successful programming. And once in a while, something truly original comes along and knocks the world out of its socks. One of this season's new shows is "Schneider's World." It is about the lovable character Schneider, who was a hit so many years ago on the show "One Day At A Time." Schneider is now an aging plumber, who solves mysteries, while cracking wise with his three teenage nieces. The plot for the pilot, which never even aired, (thank you very much, Bush-Gore debate) dealt with the problem of illiteracy among our nation's elderly population. Schneider had a heart-to-heart talk with his old friend, Doc (clearly just a nickname, since he can't read) at Uli's, a local pub on the show. Here's part of Schneider's stirring monologue. Schneider: "Aww, geez, Doc. C'mon, huh? You never learned to read? (pause) You ain't a real doctor, right? I mean, I wouldn't want you reading my chart in the operating room. Reading is important, Doc. It's almost like breathing. It gets to be second nature and you almost can't live without it. Look at me, could I be a plumber if I didn't know how to read? I might pour milk or something down a toilet, instead of the proper chemicals. Let's take you to the library, huh? Somebody there can help ya and then you can help somebody else." No worse than "Suddenly, Susan," right? Wrong. The network that owned the rights to "Schneider's World" already pulled the plug on the show, citing "too many things to be reworked to make the show financially viable." Do we care about the money or the message, America? Maybe that is what's wrong with this country. Other examples of television programs bringing back favorite characters or actors are, Colonel Klink in "Klink's Bakery," Skippy from "Family Ties" in "Skippy," and Daney Coleman and Rita Moreno in "Old Farts." "Old Farts" is actually picked to be the strongest contender among all of the new shows to be a mid-season replacement within the next five years. An example of a new television program that mimics a successful one is "Duffy the Werewolf Shooter." Duffy is a nerdy boy in Ohio, who is the newest in a long line of werewolf shooters. This is an obvious rip-off of "Buffy the Vampire Slayer," which is why it is being reworked. The last I heard, "Duffy" will be about an aging werewolf who is also a member of the NRA. He lives with his three adorable and very liberal teenage nieces, in order to stay out of a rest home. Keep your eye out for an air date. Other blatant rip-offs of successful shows are "Really Happy Days," where Potsy, Mouth and Joanie are in their 70s and are enjoying the year 2000 (be cool or they'll still tell you to "sit on it!") and "Jill and Trey," which is about a gay girl and her straight male roommate. Hilarity (and hopefully Emmys ensue). The last program I would like to mention is truly original. It is called "Lower Bennington" and is about three girls who are all nieces to each other through some crazy, mixed-up lineage, living together in a fictional New York neighborhood called "Lower Bennington." The girls are like three fish out of water but by sticking together and having heart-to-heart talks, these three girls learn about life in the big city and love. Nobody has picked up "Lower Bennington" yet, but my agent says that MTV and Oxygen are showing interest. Stay tuned. |
