An article entitled “20 little health hazards” in the latest Women's Day magazine basically targets all the “oops” I have experienced in the past six months. It's amazing I'm still alive, given the fallout from such simple slips as slicing a bagel the wrong way, wearing jeans that are too tight and walking barefoot first thing in the morning.

Treacherous bagels? According to Dr. Mark Smith an emergency medicine specialist at Washington Hospital Center in Washington, D.C., “...it's unbelievable how many bagel injuries there are.” I can relate. My left thumb still bears a one-inch scar from the time I tried to slice a frozen bagel in my left hand with a steak knife. The only thing I cut was my finger.

If squeezing into blue jeans that are too snug is a hazard, then 99 percent of the female population of the country is at risk. “Tight pants syndrome” is an actual diagnosis for persons experiencing bloating, heartburn and abdominal discomfort. And I thought it was the chili. A doctor's remedy? Lose weight or buy loose clothing. Gee, why didn't I think of that?

Now walking around barefoot in the a.m. never caused me concern, until I read, “walking without heel support RUPTURES NEW TISSUE FORMATIONS.” I'm slowly killing my feet, and I never knew it. The solution? Slippers or shoes with a small heel. Now does that include those cute little satin boudoir shoes with marabou feathers?

Probably the most inane annoyances mentioned included forgetting to blink and blowing your nose. I never knew that I might be at risk for “computer vision syndrome.” Once you start to concentrate on the number of times you blink in a minute, the less you're likely to do it. Eye discomfort can be simply relieved by focusing on a distant object, like a fly strip, for a few moments to rest the ole' peepers.

The most alarming news of all concerns blowing your nose. “Keep it to a minimum,” warn the experts. Honking your schnoz when you have a cold can actually force bacteria into your sinuses. Eeeuuuuwwww! It's better to relieve symptoms with over the counter preparations than spend you day depleting a box of Puffs.

And there you have it; the latest health warnings from the frontlines. Buy a bagel slicer gadget, invest in a new pair of jeans, slip on your slippers, blink, and whatever you do, don't blow your nose. Be careful; it's a jungle out there.



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