Someone asked me the other day how we've gotten into this unnecessary political conundrum, and this is what I told him.

The Reptant (sic) Republicans were Rebuffed for Residency in the White House and Refused to Recognize the Rule of the "Rabble." The self-Righteous, wRongly Religious, Rancorous Raptors of the ultra right Recoiled at the Resurgence of their Rival and Reconciled to Recapture their Regency by heaping Recrement on the Rascal.

They hired the Reactionary Rattlesnake staRR, vassal of the Rich Recreant Richard Mellon Scaife to Raid, Remonstrate, Reproach, Repudiate, Recast, Ravish, Raze, Revile, Ram, and Remove.

The Rottweiler DeLay with his penchant for Roulette pushed the Ragtag Republicans across the Rubicon to Rupture bi-paRtisanship, Remove Reason, and Reject Relevancy. These are the same Republicans who Rallied to the Racketeer Ronald Reagan when he Rendered aRms to iRan and unRepentantly Repudiated the Role of Congress.

We can only hope the Repugnant Republicans will Reap the Rewards of their Reticence and we can sing their Requiem in 2000.