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Bouncing back from failure

Several years ago, a leading women's magazine carried the story of a 39-year-old mother of four who suddenly suffered a splitting headache. Before she knew what had happened, she was undergoing surgery for a brain aneurism. The operation was a success, but an unusual thing happened. Partial amnesia caused her to forget 16 years of her life. In her mind, she was 23, the mother of four small children. Her medical condition had caused her mind to erase all of those years of happiness and achievement along with hardship and disappointment.

Have you ever had a bad experience you wish you could forget? A failure you wish you could erase? How do you approach failure?

In “Failing Forward,” John Maxwell writes, “The difference between average people and achieving people is their perception of and response to failure.” Do we fear failure, or learn from failure? Do we dwell on our failure, or move on from failure?

Paul understood what it meant to move on. He wrote in Philippians 3:13, “One thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward calling of God in Jesus Christ.”

Paul was not saying it was natural to blot out failure fully from our minds. However, he had deliberately chosen not to dwell on the failure. He was moving on from the mistakes and missed opportunities of the past, pressing toward a higher calling. He had learned that failure does not have to be final.

Failure can be a good teacher. Basketball coach Rick pitino said, “Failure is good. It's fertilizer. Everything I've learned about coaching I've learned from making mistakes.”

Inventor Charles Kettering's suggested that we must learn to fail intelligently. “Once you've failed, analyze the problem and find out why, because each failure is one more step leading up to the cathedral of success. The only time you don't want to fail is the last time you try.” He said we can turn failure into success when we honestly face defeat; when we learn all we can from it, instead of wasting the failure by failing to learn; and when we never use failure as an excuse to not try again (Our Daily Bread, April 3, 2003).

On New Year's Day, 1929, Georgia Tech played the University of California in the Rose Bowl. In that game, Roy Reigels recovered a fumble for California. He somehow become confused, and started running in the wrong direction. He ran 65 yards before one of his own teammates overtook him and tackled him. When California attempted to punt, Tech blocked the kick and scored a safety, which was the ultimate margin of victory.

This critical play came in the first half. At halftime, the players sat on benches and on the floor. Reigels retreated to a corner, put his head in his hands and wept over his costly mistake.

There was no halftime pep talk. The coach was quiet. When it was time to hit the field, the coach said, “Men, the same team that started the first half will start the second half.”

The players trotted out to the field, all but Reigels. The coach called, but Reigels stayed put. Reigels said, “Coach, I can't do it. I've ruined you. I've ruined the school and the team. I can't face that crowd.” Then the coach reached out and put his hand on Reigels' shoulder and said, “Roy, get up and get out there; the game is only half over.”

If we are going to achieve our highest potential in Christian growth, we have to learn how to bounce back from failure, quit feeling sorry for ourselves, and press forward instead of looking backward.

Just because you've failed doesn't make you a failure. Keep the big picture in mind. This mistake was just one blip on a bigger screen. As they say in Texas, “It doesn't matter how much milk you spill as long as you don't lose the cow.”

[Dr. David L. Chancey is pastor, McDonough Road Baptist Church in Fayetteville. The church family meets at 352 McDonough Road and invites you to join them for Bible study at 9:45 a.m. and worship at 10:55 a.m. this Sunday. Visit them on the Web at www.mcdonoughroad.org.]