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Wednesday, Aug. 10, 2005 | ||
What do you think of this story? Bad Links? | You get what you pay forLast Thursday night I decided to go see The Devils Rejects, Rob Zombies latest directorial effort which was playing its last night at Tinseltown here in Fayetteville. Needless to say, the movie was horrendous for a variety of reasons, but the worst thing about my Zombie experience had to do with the three audience members sitting in front of me. Little did I know that there would be some of the Devils Rejects watching the film with me. I know what youre thinking. What do you expect from an audience that pays good money to see something like that? Well, first of all, I dont know that they paid good money. All I know is they were there to ruin it for me and the one other guy who did pay good money. Perhaps the most disturbing thing about these three hoodlums was that they were teenage girls. They came in late, laughing and talking like they were on their way to study hall. I guess they figured since there were only two other people in the audience besides them that we wouldnt mind if they just hung out and made noise. This kind of thing always happens to me. I get there early and find a good seat. That night I sat in the back row. I was comfy. I had my popcorn and my soda. I was ready to be frightened and horrified. I thought I had it made. Only one other guy was at the 8 p.m. showing. It was almost a private screening almost. I should have known better. As soon as the credits began to roll, in they came. I gave them a few minutes to quiet down. That wasnt about to happen, so I did what I always do in these situations. I grabbed my popcorn and soda and I moved away from them. Somehow I knew it wasnt going to work this time. They just got louder, more demonstrative. About halfway through the movie, they all started cackling and laughing like banshees. One of them started kicking the seat in front of her repeatedly, going into hysterics. I turned around and tried to make out what was up with these delinquents and could just barely see the glare shooting back at me from one of them. Thats when I grabbed my goodies and marched out. I went up to the ticket girl who had been so off-hand to me when I had entered and told I wanted to see the manager, Now! A young lady popped up out of nowhere and said she was one of the managers. I told her I wanted a rain check and that there were three girls in the movie making all kinds of noise. She apologized and I got my rain check. I felt a little better. Still, I was disappointed for a variety of reasons. First of all, the movie was just plain bad. Poorly acted, unimaginative, sadistic and mean-spirited; Zombies tired retreads of 60s gore-fests are pointless and stupid. Somehow I thought it was going to better than House of a 1000 Corpses. It couldnt be worse. It was. Oh well, I wasnt expecting much and I didnt get much. Second, I just wanted to have a good scare for a few bucks. Little did I know it would be provided by three creepy teenagers high on their own cuteness. More than scary, it was sad. When did girls start acting like this? Where was all this hostility coming from? The age of innocence has certainly passed us by. Welcome to the age of raging attitudes. Some might say the answer is right up there on the big screen. Maybe. Im not too sure. Ive been a fan of horror movies for years, but I still behave with courtesy when I sit down in a theatre to enjoy the show. I guess Im just really into it. People who disrupt movies like these girls did arent there to see the film. Theyre there to have a laugh at the expense of other patrons. Its no wonder that ticket sales are off. Who wants to shell out eight or ten bucks to see a movie when the whole experience can be ruined by a total strangers bad behavior? Shusshing people doesnt work. Who knows what someone might do these days to a Shussher? In the old days the ushers would come into the show occasionally to check on the audience. They made people get their feet off the seats or stopped people from making out. Nowadays they dont dare. Some ushers are young girls themselves and I wouldnt expect them to shine their flashlight in someones face. Who knows what may be illuminated, a knife, a gun, a weapon of mass destruction? Often people come in with babies and toddlers like its O.K. It shouldnt be allowed. Get a baby sitter like everyone else. Children under five have no business in a theater, period. After last week, Im thinking children under 18 have no business being in a theater either.
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