Friday, August 2, 2002
Friday, August 2, 2002 |
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When sick, use sure homegrown remedy or risk getting another cat By Rick Ryckeley Last week, something happened that has only happened three times in my adult life. Now, I know all of the guys out there are laughing, but I'm not talking about that. Last week I had the sinus-sore-throat-coughing-chest-congestion plague that's going around, and it got me good. So good in fact, that for the third time in my life, I had to call in sick at work. That's right, poor Fireman Rick got sick and could not ride in his fire truck. No pulling people out of burning buildings. No un-trapping people trapped in crumpled cars or even getting cats out of trees. Instead, he stayed at home brought down to his knees by a simple, infectious little bug. The Wife took one look at me that morning and said, "Rick, you look really sick." Okay, now all you women can stop laughing. The Wife told me to get into the car. "We're going to see the doctor, and get a prescription for your sinus-sore-throat-coughing-chest-congestion plague." I told her, "We don't have to see the doctor, and I don't need a prescription all we needed to do is go to the grocery store." As she drove, The Wife looked at me like I was delirious - which, of late is quite often - so I explained. When growing up, any time us four boys or The Sister were sick, Mom knew just what to do so we'd get well. Mom bypassed the doctor's office and simply made a trip to the grocery store instead. This was back when there were no banks or drug stores in the grocery stores just groceries. Buying only food and drinks at a grocery store a novel concept that somehow has been discarded and pushed aside in the name of progress. Arriving at the grocery store, Mom searched the aisles for the miracle cure of the South. She picked up the two items that were considered the cure-all for anything that ails ya. This miracle cure has been passed down in our Georgia family for over 100 years. In fact, you'll be hard pressed to find a family in Georgia not familiar with it. It's been widely known around these parts that a tall glass of Coca-Cola on ice and saltine crackers can cure just about anything. Yes, before the age of PPOs, HMOs, formulated and non-formulated drugs, deductibles and co-pays, there was Coca-Cola and saltine crackers. The Wife tells me up North the miracle cure was ginger ale and saltine crackers - least they got half of it right. When Mom returned from the grocery store and came into the room with Coca-Cola on ice and a plate full of saltine crackers, you just knew you were gonna pull through. If we were really sick, she'd place a cold compress on our foreheads and replace it every 20 minutes. If that didn't work, Dad would come in with his cure - which never worked. Dad's cure was to use Vicks Vapo-Rub and not just a little bit either. He'd get a tub of vapor rub from the army P.X., and with a spatula from the kitchen, spread an inch of the sticky smelly stuff on our chest. When he was through, he would always make us eat a spoonful of it. When we complained he'd say, "Ahh it's good for you. It'll make your sore throat go away." Got news for you Dad, my sore throat never went away - it just went numb. Soon after eating a spoonful of Vicks Vapo-Rub, we really needed to see the doctor, so Mom would make the call. The doctor on call at the office would make a house call and give us a shot of some medication that somehow cured us, but I know differently. It wasn't the shot that cured us, it was the old family cure: Coca-Cola on ice and saltine crackers that mom gave us after he left. Doctors' house calls another novel concept that has gone by the wayside in the name of progress. After leaving the doctor's office, The Wife and I went to the grocery store so we could get my medication. While she was at the drug counter filling my prescription, I was filling the shopping cart with the ingredients for our old family cure - Coca-Cola and saltine crackers. Upon arriving back at the house, a small charcoal kitten had taken up residence on our front steps. In this life you're either a cat person or dog person. The Wife's a cat person. I'm not. "Isn't she cute?" Before I could answer her, it started to rain and the cat started to purr. "We can't just leave her out here all alone in the rain. Can't we keep her?" In my weakened state, I said yes, and now we're the proud parents of a charcoal kitten called Cinder. When I get better, I'll make a trip back to the grocery store - must make sure we never run out of Coca-Cola and saltine crackers again! I gotta stay well, if I get sick again we could come home from the doctors' office and find another cat. We can't afford another mouth to feed. [Rick Ryckeley is employed by the Fayette County Department of Fire and Emergency Services. He can be reached at saferick@bellsouth.net.] |